Padme’s got a secret; Anakin doesn’t know what he wants (and doesn’t know what a metaphor is.)
Anakin is well on the Road to Nowhere Good; Dooku learns an important lesson the hard way.
Artoo sends Luke off on an early-morning errand; Obi-Wan presents the Abridged and Not Entirely Accurate History of the Clone Wars.
The Jedi Order has its worst day in a long time; Darth Vader arrives on the scene; Obi-Wan escapes death but will maybe wish he hadn’t.
Anakin complains a lot; Sidious pulls off his barely-there disguise; Grievous meets his fate.
Anakin gets some Big News and has his first, but not last, temper tantrum of this film; Obi-Wan is an embarrassed dad with a Bad Feeling About This.
Obi-Wan and Anakin are the Handsome Heroes we all deserve; Sheev is a gloriously wicked villain; I love this movie so much.
Sheev makes some big gains; Anakin loses major ground in his own battle; I do a lot of anguished yelling.
Palpatine’s got a New Plan; Anakin is not coming out of this one without a little more Dark Side.
Anakin and Obi-Wan talk things out at a volcano; the gang finally escapes Crazytown.